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Tuesday, December 8, 2015


That's what I think of when I see my tremendous belly. This kinda fat requires a merciless grid. A 6 pack in 8 weeks ?

I should've chosen a longer timeframe for the blog name..Dayum... Like 6 pack in 8 years or so...

Anyway, here is the deal. I gotta lose weight fast. Predominantly fat of course. I've got this photo shoot deal and they want me to reach physical perfection using Musclepharm products only.

And then I'm signing up as a sports athlete...this stuff is more exhausting than I thought, next time around I'm gonna be a brand representative for McDonalds or something...

These guys gave me till Jan 31st as the photoshoot is in the first week of Feb. That's just about 8 weeks.

It's not whether I can lose weight fast, I gotta look good man. Some muscle volume on my deltoids, quads, the works, and of course a ripped 6 pack.

How am I gonna tackle the belly? Here is back of the envelope strategy
1. Weigh the carbs, watch this shit super close.
2. Double down on protein. Musclepharm Combat baby.
3. Hit the gym 8 days a week
4. Lift weights like Atlas
5. When the going gets tough, blast another another mile....fuck the world...

Saturday, December 5, 2015

The Desolation of Smaug

I just survived an LOTR marathon...inclusive of the Hobbit Trilogy....

Me daughter says I look like an Orc.

Looks like Ive accumulated some muscle.

Yesterday a girl asked me, "Hey Ejaz, where is your waist?"

Fuck Yea....

All thanks to Ass To Grass squats and some Iron Dream :-)

I is gonna rip up into a 6 pack Orc in no time.

Gonna cast a fuckin shadow on the Sun.

Fuck The World.

Signing off...

The Pharmer.

Monday, November 30, 2015


Hello Motherfuckers.

Im feeling good.

Yes, I dont know anybody who can lift heavier than me.

Does it matter?


What am I gonna do about it?

Im gonna stack a bit of muscle.

I just found a great source of protein....a catering joint around the corner...

Truck loads of chicken, fish and meat.

Super cheap B-)

The catch? I just get lunch there....but its an all you can eat B-)

Fuck....they have no fuckin idea....This Is The Pharmer....all I can eat?....Man...I IS Eat.....bwahahahaha

Construction starts Today.

I break the gym at 05.30 and I feed the Kraken at 12.00 noon.

Im gonna stack another 20 lbs of muscle in 30 fuckin days ,and Dwarf The Colosseum.


Coz I can.

No steroids motherfuckers. So fuck all yall.

This is one of the supplements Im using.

Buy it Now. 

Sunday, November 22, 2015

2 Incidents.

2 things happened.

Fuckin eye openers.

1. I read this book called Relentless. Tim Grover. Michael Jordan's trainer. Fuck.

My Takeaway: I am a Cleaner. I shall not spare a single ounce of mind throttle ever. "Beast aint a mode, they're just beasts." - Tim Grover

2. I saw these guys called Ulisses Jr & Simeon Panda on YouTube. And I just realized...they natural... no steroids.

Lesson Learnt: I always thought Im The Shit, just coz I dont take steroids and I lift heavier than anyone I know. But now I've realized there are guys a lot bigger than me, and they are all natural. Here I am walking around sporting my 42 inch waistline, saying Im Gangsta....more like Wanksta....:(

Action Steps.

1. I gonna build my frame so big, that Ulisses gonna look like a wart on my bicep.
2. Im gonna follow my secret 7 sauce, which I'll put into an ebook once Im done and sell it all yall for millions of dollars.

Im gonna rip up this fat gut of mine in 8 weeks.

Bend some metal, wreck some steel.


Enough Talk. Let's Walk.

This is how I'm gonna fuel my muscle B-)

And if you girls wanna burn some fat while stacking some muscle, this is for you >>

Sunday, November 1, 2015

Herculean in 14 Days

I am 35 years old.

Strongest I have ever been.

Still leg pressing a tonne for 15 reps.

I have started a 14 day sprint towards The Pharmer.

My gut is around 42", fat % maybe around 22%, down from 29% in 4 weeks.

I dropped 5% of fat, without any loss in body weight.

Yes, I know. I Am The Pharmer.

The next 14 days will be The Best Test. Literally. Getting Testosterone up all natural.

Fuck you steroid junkies, and fuck you growth hormone pricks who are competing in INBA competitions claiming to be natural. You know who the fuck you are. I'll sleep with your  mothers once Im done with my program...bitches.

I weigh 245 lbs and am slightly north of 5"10.

And yes, to my knowledge, I am the heaviest lifter, in the 10 rep range, that I know of.

Of course there might be someone stronger than me, but Im yet to meet him.

I am The Pharmer.

Stay tuned, I have the secret to "to monster muscle mass and the fastest fuckin 6 pack ever". Im gonna put this in an ebook and charge you guys shit loads of money to buy it.

9 years of natural bodybuilding.

All in one book.

It doesnt get better than that.

Enough of the sales talk. Now listen to this.

Im 42" waistline at the time of writing this post.

When Im ripped to a 6 pack, Im at 30"

I reckon it should take about 8 weeks, but, I'll post results on a weekly basis.

I aint taking any steroids but Im taking shit loads of supplements. They are all musclepharm. I call myself, the MusclePharmer.

Fuck The World.

There aint no musclebuild without recuperation.

My Weapon is Iron Dream

Wednesday, June 3, 2015

Forty fuckin two inches

I've got 9 days for the competition.

Waistline is an illogical 42 inches with 6 pack no where in sight.

Only positives are that I have stacked some muscle mass and am stronger than ever. 

But what's the fuckin point man? 6 pack is paramount for symmetry.

So I've got this new 9 fuckin day program to chisel my frame.

Lifting heavy weights and some crazy cardio. I don't wanna 6 pack at the cost of my natural muscle mass.

Let's see how this unfolds.

Wednesday, May 13, 2015

6 pack in 4 weeks ?

Man this is fucked up.

I have only 4 weeks left to get on stage...and I can't even see my 6 pack.

Tremendous gut in the way.

Muscle mass has gone up considerably. I'm slightly more stronger than my usual levels.

Leg pressing a little shy of a ton (900kg) for 15 reps, barbell shrugs at 220kg for 10 reps, shoulder press at 200kg for 10 reps, yea... Life is good.

So how do I get a 6 pack in 30 fuckin days ?

First of all, let's get some clarity on the goals here. A mere 6 pack is no good on stage. It has to be chiseled, I should be around 5% fat. I'm what, 20%+ now ?

So basically I should reach visibility on my 6 pack a lot sooner, because the last few weeks have to be used for the final chiseling bit.

Define 'a lot sooner'

I need to reach 6 pack visibility on my 42" waistline within the next 14 days. That's what? 10 inches of waistline in 10 days ? WTF.

What are the chances huh ? Anyway, being a student of probability theory, Im gonna use some random ass stochastic processes to manifest my 6 pack.

Nothing is  impossible. It's just a matter of probability.

So what are the chances that I get a 6 pack in 10 days ? 1 in a million ? Fine. So what's the next step.


What is the secret to success in any aspect of life ? 2 things

1. Minimize of odds of failure
2. Increase odds of success

Although 1 in a million is a bit ambitious, ain't nothin to it but to do it.

The game plan ? Here goes

1. Hyper trophy - contrary to the advice of every bodybuilder who's walked the planet, I'm gonna bulk till dooms day

2. Drown - I'm gonna double down on water intake.

3. Chewing the Cud - Broccoli is my new bitch. I'm gonna eat her all day

4. Everything's fishy - WWF is gonna have to worry about a whole new streak of endangered fish species by the time I'm done.

5. Aerobics - as pussy as it may sound, I'm incorporating 2 variations of this EXCLUDING my hypertrophic endeavors.

6. No more freedom for free radicals - gonna double down with my anti oxidants

7. Pharmer's harvest - all supplements are from musclepharm. Protein, creatine, multivitamin, the works

8. Hibernation - gonna double down on long deep sleep and afternoon naps. Thanks to relax m for great knock out effects

9. Good bye kidneys - gonna eat more protein than the Kraken can fathom. I hope my kidneys can take 4 weeks of this. Dear Kidneyrane and Kidneyrina, I promise you honies I'll give you a break immediately after the competition. Bear with me and keep filtering that protein would ya ? I promise I'll take liv52 and truck loads of water to protect your ass.

10. Psychopath Mode - clearly this kinda beating is not for the sane. The brain will take a subtle detour to the road less traveled, hoping to return back to the 'sane' world of 'society' soon after competition.

So there you go. That's 10 steps to reduce the probability of failure and increase the probability of success.
Let's see how the days unfold.

Signing off with waistline at 42 inches